Penny Pinchin' Mom

Hiding Behind A Computer Doesn’t Entitle One To Be Rude

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So, I’ve been at this job long enough to know that some people are rude.  They visit site after site, leaving comments that they would probably never say to some one’s face.  It makes me mad.  It makes me REALLY mad.

Since when, is it OK to gripe, complain and tell someone off simply because you are behind a monitor?  IT IS NOT OK!!!  Manners are manners and it seems, that many people feel they are entitled or it is OK to rip apart bloggers, other readers or people in general, simply because they are not talking to one another face to face.

One instance is free offers.  The comments that I see people leave not only on Facebook or here on the site make my jaw drop open.  Those that I see on a company’s Facebook page where they are furious because the server is overloaded, or they ran out of coupons are just down right appalling.  There is NO reason that people have to act like this.

I am just so tired of people being ungrateful when it comes to free offers, high value coupons or even good deals.  Not everyone in the USA is going to get them.  Not everyone can will be able to hit a website to print a coupon at the same time.  Not everyone will even be able to get the same deal before the product is out of stock.  Why, is it OK for someone to leave nasty comments as a result?  It isn’t.

It even applies to products – just because someone posts a deal for a product they love does not give people the right to come onto their site and rip them apart simply because THEY had a bad experience.  I seem to be reading more and more instances where a blogger shared a good deal on a product. Someone, who had a bad experience feels they are entitled to tell the blogger how “horrible of you to post such a deal.”  Not everyone will like the same product, just like not everyone likes to eat the same foods. We all love different things, but telling a blogger that they are horrible or ‘how dare they’ share a deal because of your opinoin, is down right shameful.

While I realize that having freedom of speech is wonderful right for all Americans, there are times when one should learn to bite their tongue…or rather, just sit on their hands.

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Comments

    • I agree! And thank you for all your time helping us for great money saver ideas!!! I have used many of your ideas and yes some of the coupons were no longer in use. It’s not the end of the world. Again, I had great luck with some coupons and bad luck loading coupons. No big deal!!! You have my support!

    • Couldn’t agree more… I would never dream of doing something like that. If I miss out on a great deal… my loss I’ll get another one or try to be quicker next time. Glad someone else was lucky enough to get in on it.

  2. Girl I think if people realized just how little money we make for all of the work we do, they would hopefully think twice about complaining at all. I believe it’s a privledge for us to offer them a heads up about these great deals and freebies and instead of complaining they should be grateful.

    I have called people out before on company facebook pages for being rude. It’s truly in bad taste for them to behave this way. Kuddos to you!

  3. Yes, I agree with you! Our radio station here had a free giveaway to Miley Cyrus concert tickets, parents who could not get one for their kids threatened to sue the radio talk show host and send nasty e-mails to them. Its just sad that these people are adults and yet they act like selfish children who throw tantrums when things don’t go their way.

  4. Thank you. Had problems with this over the last two weeks and it hurts to be called names when all you want to do it help people. While I believe in freedom of speech, I also believe that if you call me names or another reader names, I have the right to delete your comment. 🙂

  5. I am sorry you must deal with nasty comments. You are here to help your readers get great deals, coupons, freebies. I certainly appreciate all your hard work and dedication. BRAVO!!!

  6. How true is this! Sadly this is true EVERYWHERE. From message boards (have you seen some parenting boards, OMG! It’s CRAZY) Blogs, facebook, you name it. People have no respect for anyone anymore because they get to hide behind a computer and not talk “face to face” I bet if people were to say some of these things in person, they’d be picking themselves up off the floor for sure!

    My motto? Don’t say online what you wouldn’t say face to face. If you wouldn’t normally have an attitude face to face, don’t have one online. Don’t create a “secret” alter ego online. Be REAL.

    Then again…I do truly believe that some people really ARE just mean and hateful people….

  8. I agree — people get brave when they hide behind an anonymous screen name. I sometimes wonder if that’s really their personalities or if its an alter-ego that presents itself because nobody knows who they are. Keep up the good work and don’t let any naysayers get you down ..

  9. You Go Girl! I agree totally! How about when you post a great retail deal and they slam the shipping associated with even after you write it in your post! Even with high shipping your saving $25 bucks off! It’s nuts the mentality that some people hold as we’re plugging away a FREE service for people from the kindness of our heart.

  10. Agree with previous poster, well said! I’m so glad you keep the strength to keep going when some may be ungrateful. Just know that for every one rude person, there are hundreds out there that are are truly grateful for your efforts and appreciate what you do. We simply print your match-ups and coupons and maybe we don’t express our gratitude. Maybe us grateful posters just don’t tell you that enough, so THANK YOU TRACIE! You are fabulous at what you do, please keep up the good work!

  11. I’m also mortified by these horrible comments. I’ve stopped even bothering to click on “comments” on online news stories. They are vile and reprehensible and I feel “dirtied” just by having read them.

  12. I heard this on some late night TV. “Would you say, in person, face-to-face, what you say (or shout) in your car?”
    If you were behind a little ole lady in the hallway moving slowly, would you yell, huff and puff, to get her to move more quickly?
    I don’t think so.
    We have lost our manners.
    Maybe we can try to find them again.
    Walk the good walk. Fight the good fight. Don’t be brought down to their level. It’s what they want.

    • I said what I usually say in my car out loud to the person in front of me. They heard me. Needless to say I was rolling up the window and locking the doors, Won’t be doing that again!

  15. I have never left a comment on your site before, but I had to say Amen!
    As another blogger, I appreciate you taking the time to say these things. We work so hard only to get yelled at for things we have no control over. It is so hard to not take it personally and bother you all day. Thank you again for a fantastic site and all your hard work!

  16. I feel the same way about Facebook. Would you call all your friends and tell them about your personal business? I think not. There is a scary trend of people being just rude in general.

  17. I have had personal experience with people feeling entitled to demean my comments regarding a product I have loved with their own gripes about how they hate it. Everyone is entitled to review a product or share their opinions. If one negative bit of feedback against a product was all it took to stop people from buying it, then there would be NO products on the shelves. You are right that computer monitors seem to give people a false sense of bravado that unfortunately leads them to be rude, crass, and pretty unlikable. You, however, are totally likable! Keep up the great work!

  19. Very well said Tracie. I’m sorry for the times I’ve been frustrated over a deal not going my way, but you’ve always explained to me how I misunderstood and caused my own head aches 😀 I am also flabberghasted at the comments I read on FB pages and blogs regarding people’s unhappiness. There are two thoughts running through my head at those times:
    1) From Thumper in Bambi: “If you don’t have nothin nice to say, don’t say anything at all”
    2) From Craig Ferguson at his KC show: 1) Does this need to be said? 2) Does this need to be said right now? and 3) Does this need to be said right now BY ME?

    I am grateful for you and the other savings blogs that I read for doing the work of finding and posting the potential deals. I have learned that they might not all work out for me but quite often the fun is in the hunt! (Most recent example were the Lowe’s Facebook parties, man that was a lot of cyberstalking for no reward, lol!!!)

    I hope folks can figure out that the golden rule applies in so many situations be it a conversation or a forum. Ranting is a way to let off steam, but there is a way to do it that is not so blistering or confrontational. I will keep working on my short sightedness as well 😀 Thank you for all your work and honesty out here in cyberspace 😀

  20. I’ve often read your responses to some of the comments you’ve received and wondered how you maintain your patience and kindness. Although they aren’t common, those reeking of entitlement and “what’s in it for me” are certainly discouraging and embarrassing to read. May your inbox be overloaded with apologies, thank-yous, and compliments.

  22. I agree with KL- it totally ruins my day when I get nasties. I always take it so personally and really there is not one single thing I can do if Amazon raises a price or if a great coupon is gone in 7 minutes flat. Not one thing I can do to change or control that so yelling at me does no one any good. I would just add one other thing and that is not every deal is for everyone. If you like to pay $15 or less for jeans there is no reason to knock another person for thinking $75 is a great deal. We all have a different perception of value and it is important to respect each other.

    Thanks Tracie!

  23. Thank you for posting this!! I was appalled at how rude people were when payless shoes gave away 100 samples of their new beauty line and people posted nasty things on their wall about how unfair it was of them to only release 100 and what a crappy company they were. Payless was generous enough to allow 100 customers a chance to try a full-size product before it was in stores! Just because some people missed out they had to tear a good company down. Who knows if Payless will ever run another sample campaign again because of this negative experience??

  24. Well said Tracie! As a fellow blogger (and friend!) I know how hurtful just a simple “that was a waste of my time, the coupon won’t print!” comment can be, and while it is rarely a regular reader, it still puts a damper on my day. I am so glad that you put into words how strong written comments can be.
    And … on the other hand, I wanted to add how AWESOME it is when someone takes the time to say thank~you… a simple “thank you” can my whole day, and it makes our job worthwhile! The Golden Rule…all the way baby! Thanks for saying this, I am going to share it with my readers as well! Blessings my friend!

  25. I agree 100%!!! I remember when I participated in the Lowe’s weekend giveaway and was shocked at how many RUDE people there were, they complained and said they would never shop at Lowes again and blah blah blah. I was afraid to tell anyone I actually won more than one prize because they would have accused me of cheating.

    Luckily (knock on wood) I have yet to have a reader fuss me out because they missed a deal. I hope most understand that half these deals are time sensitive and you have to move quick.

    it’s all apart of the online freebie world, sometimes you get it sometimes you don’t. I think the longer you’re at it the easier it is to suck it up and deal when you don’t get something.

  27. Another Amen from me. You and the other bloggers work too hard to have to deal with that. If I don’t get a deal, I shrug my shoulders and go looking for the next.

    And as far as anyone equating the right to be vicious to freedom of speech, they are sorely mistaken. First amendment applies to government censorship. This is your online home. FB pages are the page holders online home. Nobody has the RIGHT to get hateful in your home.

    Thank you, Tracie, for everything you do on this site. You’ve helped more of us in ways you can never imagine!

  29. Thank you for everything you do! I too have been shocked at some of the comments I have seen on Facebook when an offer runs out or when the HUMAN behind the blog, makes an honest mistake. You do a great job and there are many of us that appreciate you and all of your hard work!

  30. Thanks for all that you do! I couldn’t agree more with what you said. When people do these things, online and in stores, it makes all of us look bad. We are fortunate to get some really great deals, and to find out about them because of people like you who do the hard work for us. Manners are manners and people are people, no matter where you are.

    The comments people left on Amazon after the Hammermill deal that turned out to be an error were fairly horrifying. Not the fault of the product — so low ratings on it make NO SENSE. And, is it really worth possibly driving a company out of business so you get cheap paper? I doubt those leaving the comments would want to be judged as harshly about mistakes they make.

    So again, thank you for doing such a great job!

  31. You guys provide a service for all of us. Perhaps a deal you post is not for me, but the next reader might be super excited about it. Bloggers post the deals as they see them and are unable to control the situation once it is posted. I keep missing the Valspar paint sample. Ok guess its your fault. Right? No I’ll just keep trying.

    And yes I thank companies for giving me the opportunity to get free produces. Do I complain if some one wins one and I don’t? Heck no! I am excited for them. Jealous? Yes. But bitter at them? No! The only situation in which I was super frustrated was the few people that got 6 or 7 of the Lowe’s 90% off items. I felt there should be a limit.

  32. Thank you for this post! People need to realize all the hard work that goes into sites like yours and appreciate it!! And they need to appreciate the companies that give us these offers, in which they don’t have to! I for one am very grateful for all your hard work! Because of YOU and others like You, I have been able to save a ton of money for my family and have been able to give my family more and better things. We should all never ever look a gift horse in the mouth so to speak. God bless you sister!!!!!

  33. I am so sorry that happens to you. I love these blogs but this is the first time I have left a comment. Just know there are happy grateful people out there, we just need to say thank you more often!

  34. Well said and I completely agree! We should be thankful that companies make such offers in the first place. I haven’t been able to score most freebies, if any. We should practice what we should be preaching to our children: To be kind and respectful to others!

  35. In your paragraph about bloggers posting good deals, etc…and then the readers come on and just bash them and/or the deal they posted because of the certain store…well, sadly, this happened to me 🙁
    I am a new blogger (as of Sept. ’10) and 2 people did this to me. I though it odd because they were actually bloggers themselves!
    It kinda’ hurt me a little, I mean, in no way did they bash me or anything, but I posted about one awesome thing this store did for my sis-in-law and some other customers and they both came on and pretty much bashed the store. I mean, really? Fine. You had a bad experience with this store, but please, do not come on my blog and just crash my happy post! LOL, Know what I mean?
    I don’t know…I felt a bit defeated after that 🙁
    But Thank you so much for posting this… 🙂

  36. Tracie, just remember – not everyone that even posts “harsh” words mean to come across that way. Maybe they do and maybe they don’t. I hate to comunicate through the online world because tone of voice can mean so much or can be clarified so much easier with the spoken word. I know there are very hateful people in our world. They use their hate with their words as well. Hang in there. You are doing a great job. I know you go to a lot of work to find “deals”. Some are for me while others are not. Fo us you have tons of deals we can not use because we are gluten-free. Keep up the great work. There are many more of us out here that appreciate you than there are the “haters”. We all need to try harder to encourage others.
    I told an older gentleman recently at Silver Dollar City that I appreciated him cleaning up the grounds so that it looked really nice and we could enjoy a clean environment. You should have seen the sparkle in his eyes. Not sure he had ever had anyone tell him that he was appreciated.
    I also try to encourage the people that clean public restrooms. The are VERY much appreciated but we rarely let them know.
    We all need to look for ways to encourage others.
    THANK YOU, THANKk YOU, THANK YOU. YOU do a FANTASTIC job 🙂

  37. I just want to say how much I appreciate all the long hours you and your fellow bloggers put in so we can quickly save money. I realize that some deals do not apply to my area and that I do not check my computer so much that I do not get in on the “quicky” sales and give aways and can’t imagine why people would want to slam a company or blogger because of limitations. I am just very grateful for what I do find and have saved a lot of money and had so much fun with your blog and a couple of the others…THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

  38. Tracie I Agree Totally!! I couldn’t believe the rude (with curse words) comments on the Pizza Hut facebook when they gave away the free pizzas in a few short minutes! (and somehow people were surprised!) I always tell my teenagers don’t write something (on facebook, email, text, note etc) to someone that they wouldn’t say to their face. If you’re not sure, read it out loud if it sounds rude, don’t send it!!!!! It’s too bad that many adults don’t think about this!!! I

  40. It kills me because it’s not YOUR fault a deal doesn’t work out. People are just silly and should realize all the factors that go into a deal actually happening, then feel lucky if you get all those things to work out 🙂 Thats how I feel every time I get a great deal!

    If something doesn’t work out and no one seems to have altered the blogger I will post something as an fyi. Not a mean or cross post, but informational. I saw A LOT of horrible ones after the Dr. Oz and Lowes contests. People were so negative and mistrusting. My goodness. I’m happy I found this blog and Thank You for all your work!

  41. Well said!! I don’t get too many rude comments on my site but I’ve read them elsewhere and I really wonder if people just do it to get a rise out of the blogger. I wish I had that kind of time to waste. I think it’s pure jealousy!

  42. Very true! So glad someone said it. Whatever happened to “If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all”

    Thank you for everything you do!!

  44. Blogging has really been a crash course in customer service for me.. there have been so many times I get a comment and I literally have to take a walk before I answer.. to fully think my response through. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said: “While every deal we post may not be for you, stay tuned as there will be more coming your way!” I’ve even had to ban a few as they felt they had to pick apart EVERY post I made… ugh.. I just try to remember to lead by example and that karma comes around! 🙂

  45. I agree. it’s awful! I was lucky to be a part of Sear’s Heroes at Home program this year where they gave gift certificates to military families… I was very grateful but some sure weren’t! Their Facebook was full of complaints; it was awful. I’m not sure why people feel so entitled.

  46. I’m glad you said something because I agree with you 100% percent. I can’t tell you how many times that I have seen people fly off the handle for no good reason. People have gotten mad because they didn’t win something, or they don’t like a store, or an item. I tell you the time that I say a HUGE amount of it was when Lowe’s did there facebook thing for 90% items. People were crazy and I commented so many times asking people what right they had to say that. People are extremely ungrateful! The way I see it, companies, bloggers, people in general, do not have to give us coupons, giveaways, freebies, etc. They choose to do it. And whoever gets it, should be very grateful for it. And if you didn’t get one, literally get over it! They don’t have to do it and if they choose to stop because of the nasty people, nobody will get one. And do they really think nasty comments will get them some place? I am very grateful for any good thing that comes my way. If I miss out on a coupon, deal, giveaway, etc. I may wish that I had gotten it but I wasn’t entitled to it so I won’t pitch a fit. Now I may comment if I think something is misleading or unfair or if I had a bad experience etc. but I am not nasty about it and I always take into consideration other factors and I tell the good with the bad and let people decide what to do.

  47. Amen….too many people trying to get the free samples, coupons, etc…..act like they are entitled, you miss a deal ~ go on to the next 🙂

  49. I’m am so glad a blogger finally noticed how rude people can be, especially on facebook! I am usually the one getting to the offer to late, but I have never once posted a rude comment. We are lucky they are giving anything away for free! I am surprised the freebies haven’t stopped because of this awful behavior.

  50. Well said! How about appreciation for even knowing the coupons and deals are even out there?

    Thank you for all you do for us Tracie!

  54. Amen! I think this is true in all realms of life. As a teacher, I have had parents e-mail me with appaling verbal attacks. As my mother used to say, we are all human, so everyone should be treated with decency. I hope that the people whom this is directed at are getting the point! Thanks for your hard work!

  55. I too am appalled at the things people say. While waiting for Zoya’s 3 free nail product code and the Tide pen freebie people were literally rioting on their sites with their comments. People need to get a life and get over it. Why can’t they be happy for someone else and know their turn will come sometime. “Happy are the meek”, “Happy are the pure in heart”, “Happy are the peacemakers” Matthew 5:5, 8, & 9

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